More Shopping, Less SexWhile it’s been shown that women are just as sexual as men and women get turned on just as easy as men, the factors that stimulate each sex are less similar. Generally, women seek the security and safety of a caring man who fits into a provider role. Likewise, men seek someone who stimulates them on a sexual level, allowing them to mate and produce offspring.

I caught this and wanted to pass it on because it applies the same genetic insticts we still carry today, to the financial side of things. If nothing else, it’s good for a laugh. As long as your wife or girlfriend doesn’t see it!

I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.

FOR EXAMPLE:

One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed.

Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, ‘I don’t feel like it, I just want you to hold me.’

I said, ‘WHAT??!! What was that?!’

So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear…

‘You’re just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man.’

She responded to my puzzled look by saying, ‘Can’t you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?’

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.

The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her.

We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits.

She couldn’t decide which one to take, so I told her we’d just buy them all.

She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, ‘Lets get a pair for each outfit.’

We went on to the jewellery department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings.

Let me tell you… she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck.

I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn’t even know how to play tennis.

I think I threw her for a loop when I said, ‘That’s fine, honey.’

She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement.

Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, ‘I think this is all dear, let’s go to the cashier.’

I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, ‘No honey, I don’t feel like it.’

Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, ‘WHAT?’

I then said, ‘Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You’re just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman.’

And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, ‘Why can’t you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?’

Apparently I’m not having sex tonight either… but at least that woman knows I’m smarter than her.

Tags: , , , , ,

RSS feed

8 Comments

Comment by alex
2007-11-14 14:13:27

lol,nice

 
Pingback by rockst4r.net
2007-11-14 14:21:14

[...] AskUgg! >> The Guaranteed Way To Take Her On A Shopping Spree And Still Not Get Laid Victa G on Wednesday, November 14, 2007 at 2007-11-14T13:03 :36-0800 read it [...]

 
Comment by Onetww
2007-11-14 14:22:05

That was….nothing short of awesome.

But honestly the two of you havent connected if you didnt even take the time to reassure her that night that you indeed love her for who she is. But as long as your relationship is not that far-reaching…I give you props for powerfully demonstrating a very important fact!

 
Comment by don
2007-11-14 15:42:06

It never happened. Thats an old joke, think I heard it 20 years ago

 
Comment by shesays
2007-11-14 17:23:32

Haha, this is hilarious! Your site is pretty similar to mine. Bye!

 
Comment by Seattle Willy
2008-01-23 21:53:32

This is very true. I have explained this many times to people and the fundamental factors people need to understand are this:

– Men are attracted to women based upon 80% physical appearance (reproduction), 20% survival
– Women are attracted to men based upon 80% survival, 20% physical appearance (reproduction).

Consider this: A woman who is physically attracted to a man may initially show interest in him, but as soon as he opens his mouth and says something stupid, its all over. For men, it doesn’t matter what the woman says. If a woman is attractive, a man will stay with her no matter how crazy she becomes.

Comment by Jane
2008-01-25 12:51:01

Actually, women are attracted to different types of men over the course of their cycle. During ovulation, females become more attracted to males physically exhibiting high levels of testosterone: square jaw, hairy, muscular, etc. Your stereotypical “alpha male”. Two weeks later, women desire that 80% survival, 20% physical attraction mix. They want a beta male, a caretaker. (Basically, get the best genes for the short term and the best mate to care for children in the long term.)

Of course, hormonal birth control methods (ie., the pill) throw females into a state of constant faux pregnancy, which messes with natural attraction.

So, us female sex drives are both superficial *and* opportunistic! Silly stereotypes.

 
 
Comment by resiros
2008-12-14 19:02:22

clap clap clap

 

Sorry, the comment form is closed at this time.