My Boyfriend Visits Dating And Singles Sites - Is He Cheating On Me?
Apr 18th, 2007 by Ugg
Toby Keith has a song with a pertinent lyric here: “I wish I didn’t know now.. what I didn’t know then”. When faced with personal information about a partner, it’s best to imagine a large sign with big red letters that say “ENTER AT YOUR OWN RISK“.
Ugg,
On my boyfriends computer I recently found that he goes to singles sites he never fully registers or makes a profile or pays for any of them but he goes to like yahoo personals, eharmony, americansingles and looks up a lot of profiles and on top of that he even goes to those sexual singles sites the ones where people
are just looking to hook up.We have been together for a while and this has happened before but when i confronted him about it he said that he just wants to see if he knows anyone on those sites but that is bull… But it is really bothering me.. So how do i bring it up without making it look like ive been snooping on his computer?? And what the hell is up with him always looking on those sites?? Please Help
The unfortunate truth is that if nothing else, you’ve established that he was lying. Men and women often do this when “busted” because it ends the conversation and avoids the fact that you don’t really want an answer, you just want to talk about it.
Again though, this is neither the time nor the place. When confronting someone about something, you need to ask yourself, “Do I really want an answer? Will just an answer satisfy me? Or do I want to know why and talk about the why”. If it’s the latter, which it most often is, it’s better to take some time to really get your thoughts down. Putting someone on the spot will only allow them to give the easiest and often the worst answers. This is a serious discussion that needs to take place later when you’re more able to truly deal with the realities of the “what’s next”.
Now, on to that let’s take a look at this:
“On my boyfriends computer I recently found that he goes to singles sites”
- With the internet and the popularity of social networking, this is not uncommon. One of the first signs of a cheating partner or a partner thinking of cheating is simple things like simply creating a MySpace account. You’ll often hear that “it’s only to find old friends” which is already similar to what you’ve been told.
“He never fully registers, makes a profile, or pays for any of them but he goes to yahoo personals, eharmony, americansingles and looks up a lot of profiles”
- He’s browsing, to see what is out there. Whether he’s bored or genuinely interested, the fact is that he’s there and looking which should be of concern to you. Men need sex like they need to breathe and while men will lie to appease the women they’re with, when the enjoyment starts leaving the bedroom, they often find ways to supplement. Some men look at porn, some browse for other women, and some actually cheat.
“This has happened before but when I confronted him about it he said that he just wants to see if he knows anyone on those sites”
- You admit to yourself that you don’t believe this. And you shouldn’t. But you need to ask yourself, what have you done about it? If you truly don’t believe him, you can’t let that answer satisfy you. However, the truth is going to hurt here, and I think you’re avoiding that on purpose.
“How do I bring it up without making it look like I’ve been snooping on his computer? And what the hell is up with him always looking on those sites?”
- You really don’t need to. In this case, it’s all about how you are positioning your question. If you are ready to leave him if he admits to looking for someone else and sticking with you until he finds someone better (or willing), then just confront him. Tell him you found that on his computer and that you need an answer. It’s likely he’ll lie to you unless he’s already involved. Without irrefutable evidence (video or pics of him cheating, etc.), he’ll continue to hide behind the plausible deniability card.
What Can You Do When He Denies It Again?
There’s really nothing you can do about that, which is why you need to ask yourself how important this is to you. Do you want a man like that? Can you learn to live with the fact that he is looking elsewhere? Can you work harder and be more physically intimate without feeling like you’re not getting enough in return?
Men are physically stimulated and women are mentally stimulated (for the most part). This is why men only need a steady supply of sex with a physically attractive woman, while women start to feel used when there aren’t enough deep conversations, personal and emotional gifts, etc. Simple things like putting on weight and loss of sex drive can be enough to force a man to look elsewhere.
You need to be honest with yourself about how you feel about your options. Then confront him with what you found, and be firm. If the answer to the above is that you can’t deal with a man like that, then you have to leave. If he’s still doing this behind your back, he’s either avoiding a difficult answer to your question, or he just doesn’t care either way. If you feel that you can change, then avoid bringing it up and focus on what you think you need to change (work out, be more physically intimate, nag less, etc.).
In today’s society, promiscuity is ingrained in everything we read to everything we watch on TV. As we mature and get older we become better able to deal with dedicated relationships, but until then.. We’re fools to try and make something work, that obviously is broken beyond repair.
Then again, to play devil’s advocate.. As this article on feelingflirty.com mentions, not all the people you meet on dating sites are ready for that next step, even if they appear to be shopping…
Check Out Some Related Posts
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- This Is What A Woman Sees When She Logs Into Her Online Dating Inbox
- Who’s Ugg?
- She’s My “Girlfriend” Now… But I’m Still Not Getting Any!
- I’m Looking To Get Married To A Guy Who Makes At Least Half A Million A Year…
- The Top 8 Reasons Why Men Cheat On The Women They’re With
- I Think My Wife Is Cheating On Me: Why Men Are Never Published In Dear Abby
- The Guaranteed Way To Take Her On A Shopping Spree And Still Not Get Laid
- Even Religious Leaders Believe The High US Divorce Rate Is Related To The Amount Of Sex!
Oh, seriously, get over yourself. I’ve read a lot of this site and most of your opinions are decent…. but to suggest the WOMAN needs to change because her man is cheating? Please. I believe that men do need sex more than women do, but they do NOT need it like they need oxygen. Sex is essential to the happiness of both genders. A wife not being sexually adventurous enough or god forbid, gaining weight, is NOT enough reason to cheat! It means it’s time to have honest discussions between yourselves, and if the problem isn’t addressed, leave, and THEN find someone else.
You manage to hide it well in most of your posts, but you are a woman hater, plain and simple. Live your life as you wish, but I doubt when you’re older and you look back at your string of flings that involved you making no connection with the person beyond sex, you’ll have some regrets. What’s the point of life if not to love and learn from other people?
Unfortunately, we seem to be saying the same thing.
You said:
It means it’s time to have honest discussions between yourselves, and if the problem isn’t addressed, leave, and THEN find someone else.
And I agree 100%.
The problem here though, is that the woman who wrote is now finding out that this is the SECOND time. It’s pretty plain that the man probably never changed.
So what to do? If he hasn’t changed and rather lies about it, do you think he can? That he wants to?
If she truly wants this relationship to work - then fight for it. But to fight 50% and then expect him to throw in his 50% is going to be futile - he doesn’t even care enough now to do anything. This is a case where if the woman wants to be at the altar with this man, she’s going to have to drag him here because it doesn’t look like he’s going to do any of the walking on his own.
Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results - you can be that I would not recommend the same course of action here. Leaving would probably be the sanest, easiest, and healthiest choice for her own sake.
when you’re older and you look back at your string of flings that involved you making no connection with the person beyond sex, you’ll have some regrets. What’s the point of life if not to love and learn from other people?
Aren’t you contradicting yourself here? By having a serious of relationships, whether or not they satisfy you beyond sexual grounds _IS_ loving and learning from other people.
I firmly believe that the high divorce rate in America is from people marrying before they truly know themselves well enough to know what they want from a life partner.
You manage to hide it well in most of your posts, but you are a woman hater, plain and simple.
To the contrary, I love women! If this were an “anti-women” site, we’d see lots of articles about men, only for men, etc. I admit I cater more to the male brain, as we’re kindred spirits, but I never turn down the opportunity to discuss female sexual issues either.
If this answer has left you unsatisfied, please feel free to contact me via the “Ask Ugg” link up top! Make sure to leave contact information and I guarantee I’ll get back to you.
Thanks for the comment!
Ugg
I did a search on Google to find a blog to see what a therapist would say about my internet activity and whether or not they would agree with my girlfriend ………Am I cheating.
My situation is very similar to the girls’ posting here. I have been caught by my girlfriend looking on similar websites. But I really only do it for passive entertainment.
I know…….you’re all saying Bullshit.
But, did you ever stop to think that other people have interaction with the opposite sex in the work place. I work from home and I don’t have daily interaction with co-workers, conversations with people about the opposite sex, office staff, people that we see at lunch….or anybody else. Where other guys may buy a calendar with sexy girls or look at girls in a magazine, I will click on a website.
MYSPACE….Yes, I have a myspace page. I have lots of pictures of me and my girlfriend on there, so trust me…..I might as well have the plague—because girls are not sending me messages wanting to hook up.
The other day, I went on MYSPACE to post a TOPIC for discussion to a sports GROUP to which I belong. Up at the top, it had a website for Triathlon Singles. So, I thought “What the hell”. Their profiles included a paragraph and one picture of them. To see more pictures or to contact them, you had to put in your e-mail address, so I didn’t do that. But, I did clicked on a dozen or so profiles and then moved on. Back on MYSPACE, I clicked on Browse to see if there were any hotties. So what….big deal.
What bothers me is that my girlfriend uses her new findings as capital to pillage every thread of my personal life. She goes through my bill fold, she reads through my e-mails, she goes into my browsing history. I told her that I don’t go through her purse, just because she leaves it on the table. I asked her how many hours and hundreds of e-mails did she have to read before realizing that I am not screwing anybody or pursuing anybody on the side.
Unfortunately, I think that torments her, becasue she has this low opinion of me that me and all of my friends are players, but she knows where I am every day and every night and she would like nothing better than to prove herself right about me.
I am a good looking guy. I can get laid on any given day —–but I don’t. I certainly don’t need the internet to do it. Do I want to get laid ??? Maybe—So do lots of guys………but we don’t. Do we talk about it? Yes……..but we don’t. So, does all of this make me a cheater ??? Well, if I am going to get convicted of it, then maybe I should start dropping my pants and get my game on.
Is it possible that the internet is just a new form of passive entertainment and girl-watching?
You women need to ask yourselves when you look at, converse or make comments about some hot new guy in the office or when you are at lunch together –if you are cheating. If you saw a handsome man in a restaurant and you had a chance to read a “free” paragraph about him would you do it? If you did, would you be cheating—even if you never talked to him?
I think you hit on a really fantastic way to describe this - online women watching.
However, I wanted to prepare the reader for the eventuality that their relationship may in fact be in danger.
You see, while YOU definitely seem to be an exception to the rule - most men cannot communicate effectively or do not believe they could have this sort of conversation with a woman without it spiraling into a breakup fight.
As a result, many men continue searching until they find something or someone better, in which case they won’t feel the risk of loss.
It may be harmless, but it also may not be, and I think that the latter is a more likely situation if you look at this over the course of the next several years.
I just want to say “THANK YOU”!!! I have caught my husband doing this and I couldn’t understand why he would do this to me. I was absolutely sick over it and I found my self doing exactly what your girlfriend did to you…I went through his e-mails obsessively, checked his wallet, checked his phone….when I finally realized that it had to stop. Either I had to accept his explanation and get over it, or leave…I chose to forgive him, but I didn’t realize that I was still holding on to just a pinch of the pain, until I read your comment! What you say is absolutely true, and if I accuse him of cheating over this, then I am just as guilty!!! Thanks for the wake-up call…..it’s much appreciated……also, it’s great to know that there are honest guys out there, proves that there is still hope!!!!
Before I met my GF, I once had a free-trial membership to match.com and actually subscribed to matchmaker at one time. During that whole period, I never set up any dates through those sites and there were plenty of opportunities. Why ??? Because, I didn’t have to. I met plent of girls the old fashioned way.
So, for me….it never has been a place to “hook-up” and set up dates. It is just girl-watching. I don’t see it any differently than 2 women sitting at a Starbucks and making a comment about a guy who walks through the door. They probably don’t say anything about the ugly guys, but you can bet the cute one gets their attention. And in the security of their anonymity, they check him out. Big deal.
And, you are right……you certainly cannot have this conversation with a woman without it sprialing out of control. Dont’ even try.
Being that I have never used to internet to meet somebody apparently doesn’t seem to matter in supporting my position. But, it’s funny how people will justify their opinion based on what thier friends say or by what somebody on the “Internet” said. How ridiculous! That doesn’t make them right. They just share the same opinion.
Just because 100 million people favor “pro-choice” doesn’t mean that the 50 million people who favor “pro-life” are wrong. Regardless if the margin of opinion is 2 to 1. It is simply a matter of opinion that happens to be different.
So, I am not saying that I am “right” or she is “wrong”. We just have a different opinion on this issue. There is an old ‘accepted” saying that it is OK to read the menu as long as you don’t order. Well, what happened to that?????
Some women think it is acceptable to flirt. And they do it openly for just that simple moment of satisfaction they get. Even if they are married or in a relationship, it’s just this little thing they do at work / at the grocery store / driving down the road. You know who you are !!! But, if the same woman were to catch her husband browsing on the internet………….he would have HELL to pay for that.
Maybe some people need to quit living the double-standard!!!!!
The debate rages. How prevalent is cheating on a loved one through Facebook/MySpace/AIM? check it out..
Every one here has good points. I feel (my opinion) is part of the problem is the internet has become a good way to avoid real people. People have forgotten and gotten lazy ( notice, I say people , not just one gender) how to use communication. We have gotten lazy, and have to many easy fixes now. It is easier to not say anything about our needs or wants or to do the work to achieve what happiness we desire. In the past, if men wanted to see naked woman, for entertainment, most guys would subscribe to Playboy. Woman, debated that issue as well, but in reality, it was hard to establish a connection with a picture only. The internet is a different medium. Anything you what, you can get! Girl or guy watching, can be easily moved into something different. Not everyone that looks, acts. But more and more do. The laziness and loss of human communication leads to, well, I am not getting……. from….., so I will go to the cookie jar and get….., I can justifiy it, I have to take care of me. They will never give me….., so why ask for it, why open myself up, they will reject me, they accuse me anyway, so instead of trying to figure this out, I”ll take care of me, lie if I get caught, they wil never know. Who needs people, when I can get from machine! Just my thoughts!
I found my man on NUMEROUS sex and dating sites. I deleted the ones I could (finding his password/username via his email.) There was one I could not delete, because he is PAYING $24.99 a month for. So…I created my own account, delete all his little buddies off his page, added myself to his page (am now his only buddy), then I changed his whole profile saying he was gay and looking for a man, telling everyone how he likes to cheat, and put his display pic as one of him and I. It still hurts and he doesn’t even know I’ve done this yet (did it today.) He’ll be in for a surprise when he goes to log in. However, I can’t help the anger…I’ve been snapping at him all day and told him it was over. He was like…”Where did this come from?? What is wrong?? What did I do??” Since this isn’t the first time he’s done it, there is no need to explain…there is not need to ‘talk’ about anything. It’s done and over and he’ll soon see why. I’m disgusted.
I see a lot of comments validating men looking at these sites but honestly if the situation were reversed what would a guy think of a girl doing those activities? Well obviously outrage and paranoia……that is a normal reaction….I just hate it when people try to justify things they themselves feel guilty for doing. Denying the guilt would be pointless because these guys have to be “caught” by these girls……whatever happened to the communication they claim they want regarding this I wonder? The sad thing is I went through this same thing and forgave him over and over eventually he got cocky and thought he could treat me like dirt cause of a “new friend” online…he set me up for an online cat fight……I refused and set the girl straight cause he fed her a bunch of lies….I befriended her and found out she liked to screw multiple guys online despite the pity proclamation of love she gave my guy…..so guys you just watch yourself cause karama does exist. Ohh and before you accuse me of snooping I noticed he was hacking into my email and trying to justify it so that led me to snoop cause anyone with a brain would realize he was worried I might be doing the same thing he was all along. Cheating 101….
I guess I kind of understand what your all saying but I also think that your only getting a portion of story nobody knows the kind of person the guy is in each situation, for example my ex boyfriend could say I snooped and found out he was “just checking out other girls” and he was he was just talking (I think) but none of you know what went on behind the scenes to lead me to believe that he could be doing such things, think about it before you go calling her a snoop if he had nothing to hide why would it bother him I was totally honest with my ex he could look at anything he wanted to because I love him and have no secrets, but I couldn’t why not!!!! because he has something to HIDE!!!!!!
and Ironically enough when I”snooped” I found that he indeed had something to hide, Men and Women alike if you need something other than the person your with Just LEAVE don’t come up with a reason to stay if your not happy just go it will be easier in the long run for all involved.
I am going thought the same situation, I wrote him this email:
Mike, last night when I saw you looking at singlesnet.com it make me realize that you are unhappy and still looking for something else. You say you love me, but your actions show something different.
Pat if you are not sure about this relationship and feel that you could find someone that can make you happier you should go for it! The only thing that I ask for is honesty. If you don’t feel fulfilled we should end up this relationship ASAP, I don’t want to waste my time, neither yours, realize that you are almost 50 years old and you should not waste your time with someone that you don’t love. Yes… it will be hard for me in the beginning but I have the advantage of my age, and I have more time to find my soul mate.
Stop lying that someone else put you in there, I saw the profile with your picture on it.
I feel betrayed, and want honesty, whatever the true is I will understand and move forward, is not only for us but for the kids, the more time we are together the hardest it will be for them to heal if this come to an end.
I feel kind of ridiculous setting up a “family photoshoot” knowing that you are still looking for woman and in different dating sites.People see us as a cute couple and family but the reality is different.
You lied and promised me that you were not in any dating site. I feel betrayed.The point is that if you are into this relationship,you should have no problem losing the online dating voyeurism, and whatever flimsy excuses you give me are irrelevant—if you cannot give it up, even knowing that it upsets me,then… let’s be friends. the trust issue is already causing me to doubt your sincerity.
His response:
A-
I am bieng honest when I told you I’m not on any dating sites…and I HONESTLY don’t know how I was placed back on there….other than to guess I receive an email and opened it up. This was a site I ddin’t sign up for but either yahoo or match put me on (I regrettably agreed to have them add me to affiliate sites).
I canceled because it was a lame site and in all honesty, my mother is more attractive than what is on there!
It did somehow pop up agaisn late last week and I looked at the site for “pure entertainment value”. I even sent one of the “beasts” to James and he got a kick out of it.
You do have trust issues and i’ve told you….you really need to trust me. I do love you but you push me away when thinks like this come up. I don’t spy on you, I don’t put hidden recorders in your car, I don’t check your emails of phone records, I don’t search your computer activity….you are an amaxing person and I find you to be absoutely beautiful….except your insecurity is pretty unattractive and I find it to be a total turn-off.
We go to the beach, have a great tiem, we go and have a nice sushi dinner…and then beacuse I look at a on-line site for pure entertainment value….you end up ruining what should have been a great weekend! I have enough shit going on in my life and I would like to think my GIRLFRIEND adds to my happiness and not my “stress”.
You really need to trust me….and I will always be fatithful….unless you continue to push me away with your lack of trust issues…
Life is too short babe…so get a flipping clue and realise I love you and would never go on a date with anyone else…
I don’t consider myself insecure, is just that after founding him in all this websites is hard for me to blind trust him, I love this men very much, he is 20 years older that me, people consider me pretty, I am a very passionate woman, I am good to him…
What should I write him back?
Do you think I am too insecure?
Thank you for reading
Oh, get out of there.
This man is extremely manipulative. I have dated someone just like this, and reading this pains me. He is making YOU feel like you are over-reacting???? Please don’t loose yourself or your values or standards for a man like this.
Get out. Love will find you, if you let it.
x
I met my boyfriend on the internent whcih was something new for me. Recently we broke up because I discovered, not “snooping” while I thought I was checking my own yahoo site e-mail that I was actually on his Yahoo site and I could not figure out who these people were that were contacting me until I began to read the mail and it was responses from women that he contacted. As adults we ALL look and some of us even touch, however after being together close to a year and my boyfriend was still searching for what may be out there, it was disturbing. The whole while he appeared to be very happy that we had found each other, however it is a lil insulting and hurtful when your guy continues to look at other women, all the while telling you and trying to show you how happy he is that he met you. The most disturbing thing about my boyfriends site when I learned which one he belonged to was that I met NONE of the criteria that he listed down when he listed what type of women would be “ideal for him”. Believe me I was not snooping I was extremley suprised that he would communicate with other women in a sexual way when I imagined I was the person he wanted to contact and talk to and all the while he was up late on the laptop while I would be sleeping, looking for what he felt was someone better I’ve learned that if you are truley happy with the person you are with, there really is not anybody else that you would have an interest in I was asking for more heartache to continue a relationship with someone that could not bring themselves to discontinue the converstations, especially when I did confront him and let him know that if we were in a serious relationship and it did not work out with us, it’s not like he cannot go back and rejoin these sites. I feel it makes some of us women feel that we are not good enough for the man that initially picked us in the first place. No I don’t believe that he ever met up with any of these women but I felt it was disrespectful to me to pretend as though he was an unattached man and he really was not because we were together. I don’t beleive many people are looking to cheat when they are on these sites but I always felt that the sites were for you to meet someone and once you have met someone, discontinue your search. I know it made me feel as though I was not good enough for him therefore I broke up with him and wished him well with his method of intenet dating or “looking” because prior to being with me anyone that he did meet on any of these sites the relationship was very short lived according to him so it kind of tells me that he was not all that successful with keeping a woman, finding one is easy but to keep her around and make her feel appreciated can be a challenge for some men
I keep finding my boyfriend on these sex/dateing websites and im not sure how i feel about it, alot of what you are saying here makes some sense but i feel so angry when i find it, and i always catch him little lies, hes lies about things i wouldnt think you wuld need to lie about like why it took an hour to meet me somewhere that takes 5 mins. He tried to sleep with my friend awhile but i forgave him, do you think he’s just full of —- ? When i confront him about the sites he just says he made it a long time ago when i caught him the first time but the dates say otherwise, he doesnt have a picutre or much filled out in his profile but still.. he says he loves me but how do you love someone that you cant be honest with? Also he lied about hooking up with another girl “apparently” he made it all up when i got upset when he told me. It makes no sense, why would you want your gf to think you were with another girl?
Baygirl
i have the same problem as most of you ladies. I am crazy in love with my boyfriend of a year & a half and i coldn’t be happier. i see it in his eyes when he looks at me and talks to me that he feels he same way about me too. but what has been causing me terrible pain is that since we started dating, i keep finding him on dating websites. the first few i found were not exactly unintentional, he left his email signed in and when i went to check my own email it was there, and included in the first page of emails were links to dating sites, so yes being a paranoid girl i had to look, and i dont think ive regretted something so much in my life! seeing the things he msgs other girls still to this day after a year and a half, brings tears to my eyes. about 3or4 months ago i thought it was all over until about a week ago my mom oddly enough was checking a dating website that she found her ex husband on, she found my boyfriend. of course she told me and said i need to talk to him about it, but i dont have the guts!! how do i bring this up??? HELP! he doesnt like to have serious conversations and often blows up and turns it around on me in situations like this, but im desperate! i need help!!!! i know (i hope) he doesnt and hasnt met any of the ppl hes msgd but it hurts me so bad to see it and read it.. someone plz respond!
hey i just wanted to let you know i am dealing with this exact situation. I found the links in my boyfriends email the exact same way you did, and it was the worst feeling i have ever had. He didnt actually subscribe, and that was the card he played when i brought it up to him, but he doesnt have a credit card.. so i continue to wonder if he would have subscribed if he could have. He basically said that he was curious to see what kind of people use those sites, and he explained the ashley madison one (the worst one) by saying that he was just looking because he heard on the news that Tiger Woods got caught on there. When i tried to talk to him about it, he madeit seem like i was crazy, insecure, and snooping through his stuff. He compared it to me going to bars, where i can look at guys and talk to them if i want. Obviously this is ridiculous because people go to bars with friends, to socialize, to dance, for lots of reasons than to meet people of the opposite sex. I havent broken up with him, mainly becuase i want to believe that he loves me and wouldnt do anything to hurt me. He promised to not log into those sites anymore, and im choosing to believe him until i have reason not to. My problem with your situation is that he did it a second time. Clearly im not one to judge, but i believe that regardless of why he did it in the first place, the fact that he did it AGAIN, after knowing how much pain and hurt he caused you the first time, is a really bad sign. If i catch my bf doing something like this again, there won’t be another chance.
you need to say to him.. i cared about you enough to let this go for the sake of our relationship, but obviously you dont value our relationship or my feelings becuase you took a huge risk and continued this behaviour which you knew killed me the first time! How can you expect me to trust you now?
fool me once, shame on you.. fool me twice, shame on me.
Hey guys & dolls, I am in the same situation..kind of. I found my boyfriend on a dating site about a year ago and went full on crazy! It was war and then I realized, we’re not married–you do what you feel you need to do and if you can find better than me–hats of to you (knowing full well he can’t find better). I’m attractive, very successful, established and can take care of myself, he’s very attractive as well and is always boasting on his ego, but his success is not up to par with mine and I think he has insecurity issues. He needs a constant boost of an ego from anyone–it could be a $2 hooker with a $3 haircut and he’ll still get a boost. Why? B/c he’s a man! Men are men and I am by no means excusing their behavior nor do I condone cheating, but at the end of the day you have to ask yourself what’s really important. Is being a crazy paranoied person going to make life easy for you? Or is putting your foot down and moving forward? Men are Men and Women are Women. If you love this person and are sleeping with this person and THEY are the ones doing WRONG, why are you beating yourself up over talking to them or putting your foot down? If they leave, they leave.
My boyfriend’s response was, “the internet isn’t real. I don’t think of that stuff as real life.” Classy answer..pahleeze…we’ve been together 5 years and we’re only human. Every now and then it’s ok to look, it’s the touching you have to worry about
good luck ladies. Don’t get yourself lost in any man or anyone. Life’s too short and you’re too special!
I found an email from a russian female to my hubby. He responded to her a couple of times. I confronted him. It is one of those phony emails where the female sender is trying to get money. Anyway, I asked him how did she get his email. He stated that he didn’t know, usually it is spam, but this one went right to his yahoo email, he said I knew it was one of those emails trying to get money, so I wanted to see how far it would go. Can this happen without signing up to one of these single sites?
My husband responded to an email he received from a russian female. He said the email showed up in his in box and she wanted to talk. He said he knew it was a scam for money, but wanted to see how long it took for “her” to ask for money. Sure enough it was. But my question is: Can one of these emails from some russian chick just show up in your inbox and you can just respond without signing up to some singles site? This sounds fishy.
Hi everyone!
I have a similiar story. I have been dating my boyfriend for years now, I did cheat on him once it was stupid and I am totally sorry this ever happened. He took me back, and we have been coping with it, it has not been easy, but he eventually forgave me and things were going well again. However, this week I was browsing the web and I saw his name on a dating website called “beautifulpeople.com”, sending messages on his board and telling the girls to add him on msn, I felt sick and betrayed and stupid. Now I know what it is like to be cheated on! I have not yet confronted him with this, as I know he will play the “you cheated too” card. But, I did tell him that I was insecure on whether one day he would find someone else and leave me, trying to see what he said. The thing is, he keeps telling me he loves me and nothing is wrong….and on the other hand I cannot talk about this incident with him, I dont think its worth talking about, perphaps he created this profile while we were in that “bad place” after I cheated
I dont know what to do!